Things To Do When You're Unemployed

In these uncertain economic times, when so many valuable people are under-utilised, I thought it would be worth while putting together a sample list of stuff you can do to fill the hours...

• Update your toenail hygiene. This is best done in your pajamas, sitting on the couch at 10am on a week-day, watching Oprah.
• Take time to really embrace the joy of waiting for the mail to arrive.
• Practice the art of extending conversations, so that your 15 minute coffee dates with your friends are smoothly stretched into hour long deep-and-meaningfuls.
• Think up creative ways to doctor your CV to explain the time you've spent unemployed.
• Score free cookies by giving blood.
• Pretend that you like walking for an hour into town, and that it's for health, not because you can't afford a bus ticket.
• Try on alllllllll your outfits, in order to ascertain what you will wear when the job interview requests come flooding in.
• Exercise the muscles in your right forefinger by hitting 'refresh' on your Facebook home page.

Good stuff, right? All suggestions guaranteed to have been tried and tested by Miss Connor herself.