The Dangers of a Wet Pussy

We're having quite the storm tonight, and Ned couldn't resist going out to blow the stink off his fur. He came back in all spiky and frisky, and managed to scrag me twice while I was trying to dry him off.

I'm covered in bandaids.

In New Zealand news: it appears that the biggest thing happening this weekend is that an elephant died at Auckland Zoo. Seriously. It's on every channel. Okay, we only have 5 channels, but still!

9 Days Till My Birthday!

Start saving your shekels/dollars/pounds/euros/drachmas.

Parallel Universe

I dropped a chickpea on the floor on Friday night, and I can't find it. After some discussion, Tracy and I agree that there is a vortex to another dimension under the couch, and the chickpea fell in.

Hooray!

I've been boasting at work that when Tracy goes on maternity leave, I shall be in the rare position of being a working woman with a full-time job and a wife at home to cook me awesome dinners.

SCOFF, they did.

SUCKERS!



And why not, I ask you? Since she's my sister, flatmate, best friend, mother of my niece/nephew, and according to the AA, my Lesbian life-partner, I think I am owed a few fancy dinners.

Nice Try

I don't think it counts as a manly kill if you bring in a mouse that has clearly been dead for some time, doesn't have any puncture wounds, and has 2 leaves stuck to it.

You wouldn't know it from the excited meowing and the ecstatic belly rolls on the carpet though. You'd think he'd just provided for a litter of kittens!

Soooo Lazy

Tracy's been on holiday for a week, and I have only just decided to bother cooking dinner. There have been plenty of leftovers and a couple of fried egg sandwiches over the sink...

A New Commercial Opportunity?

I was typing up meeting minutes the other day, and the discussion had been around new contracts that we're drawing up for contractors who specifically want to trap and kill ferrets. Such opportunities, of course, must be sent out to tender for the best value for money. Anyway, a lot of the notes referred to "ferret tenders".

Oh man, that cracked me up!

"What's for dinner, Mum?"
"Ferret Tenders and mashed potatoes!"
"Yay!"

Look for them in the freezer section of your local supermarket.