It Burns! It Burns!

There's a suspicious large yellow ball of fire in the sky, and all of Karori is steaming as two weeks' worth of rain evaporates...

I went to my first return to Book Club last night - glorious! Thanks for letting me back in, ladies! This month, we're going to read Self-Help books... Should be interesting. NO NEED FOR ANY "HELPFUL" SUGGESTIONS ON WHAT I NEED HELP WITH. You can keep your opinions to yourselves. :)

Last night I had a horrible dream about fighting with Tracy because she kept stealing my cheese toastie squares. Jody doesn't share cheese!

Things I Did Today

It's all go around here, let me tell you! I've been up since 8am, running around like a blue-arsed fly! Boy, it's a shame there aren't 25 hours in a day because I could have used the extra time! Just LOOK at what I have accomplished...

• I have maintained the shape of my pajamas by remaining in them for 20 hours straight!
• I have watched 6 straight hours of old episodes of 'House'!
• I have run up and down the stairs in the house for half an hour, because my arm went to sleep and I was worried about my circulation!
• Around 12:30 or so, I scampered up the steps to check the mail! There wasn't any.
• I put the rubbish out!
• I cooked myself a nutritious dinner (popcorn) and did some dishes!

Nah, it's not all bad news. I have also done laundry for Tracy, spent some quality time with Ned, applied for a couple of jobs, and made a few lunch dates for this week. Come on universe! Gimme a job.

Who Will Want Me Now?

Just when I thought that I was still a young, vibrant, whole-life-ahead-of-me woman.

My doctor tells me that my sore thumb might be early arthritis.

BOOOOOOOOOO.

Public Safety Announcement

Last night I dreamed that I was holding a nice fluffy pillow, and when I let go of it, it shot up into the sky and got tangled in the branches of a tree! Turns out, it had been fluffed up with helium.

Just thought I'd send out a general warning. Be careful where you release your pillows.

Things To Do When You're Unemployed

In these uncertain economic times, when so many valuable people are under-utilised, I thought it would be worth while putting together a sample list of stuff you can do to fill the hours...

• Update your toenail hygiene. This is best done in your pajamas, sitting on the couch at 10am on a week-day, watching Oprah.
• Take time to really embrace the joy of waiting for the mail to arrive.
• Practice the art of extending conversations, so that your 15 minute coffee dates with your friends are smoothly stretched into hour long deep-and-meaningfuls.
• Think up creative ways to doctor your CV to explain the time you've spent unemployed.
• Score free cookies by giving blood.
• Pretend that you like walking for an hour into town, and that it's for health, not because you can't afford a bus ticket.
• Try on alllllllll your outfits, in order to ascertain what you will wear when the job interview requests come flooding in.
• Exercise the muscles in your right forefinger by hitting 'refresh' on your Facebook home page.

Good stuff, right? All suggestions guaranteed to have been tried and tested by Miss Connor herself.

Nadir

Maybe it's just the particularly boring and non-job-filled day I've had, but I'm really starting to wonder why I came back.

Tracy Truffles are Trouble

You guys, she made SO many truffles. Probably 50, I swear. And I'm the only one home! They call to me... They whisper sweet nothings to me... "Jooooooooody... We are so creeeeeeeaaaaamy... We loooooooove you..." Just like that.

Purrrrrfection

Yeah, that's right. I'm a crazy cat lady and I feel your judgment and I DON'T CARE. Mwa ha ha ha ha!

Ned of the Toddin and his fluffy catnip-stuffed mouse. That's a recipe for a damn good time right there. Who needs television?

And to be honest, I've watched SO much TV in the last 7 months, I can't take any more.



















Ned's best angle! Ah, that's my boy.